Yesterday was one of those “dad’s don’t like to talk about” days. I got emotional and cried like a BIG baby, because I don’t have the answers in coping with Kendall’s unique Autism. The perfect day started with a phone call in the bank, asking us me remove Kendall from her class, because of another attack on the her teacher. The poor dude have the evidence looking like and Adidas add walking around with his three-strip-plasters-scratch-marks on his arms and head. 100 opinions later, debriefing and Kendall was at home with a note in her daily communication book.
Live the life with Autism
I love my daughter toooooo much to consider the easy way out in dumping her in some “home, institution, nut house”, she’s my child & responsibility even if some fuck head’s refer to me as misrepresenting myself as a parent of a child with Autism, because I am not her biological father. The sperm donor’s role is limited to 1 Birthday card in 13 years, so fuck you.
I am writing this post to serve as a wake up call that Autism Spectrum Disorder is not just about the high functioning individuals on the Autism Spectrum. Like my family there are thousands of other families in South Africa struggling with it on a daily basis. Yes, I am pissed off that Government are not taking interest in Autism in South Africa, they have a duty to support families with Autism, but until some “fat cat” child’s is diagnosed with Autism and get off his fat arse to actually doing something for their own child, nothing will happen in South Africa.
Please don’t feel sorry for me & my family, you can do something about it, shout, scream, blog, fart, become the next president, get drunk, I don’t care what you do. I need to get the Autism awareness out there so that other families don’t have to deal with this on their own.
If you want to you can buy a badge in support of April Autism Awareness Month and World Autism Awareness Day (2 April 2010) for ZAR 5 to help me getting the word out there that more than 1% of our population in South Africa can not be ignored no more.
Autism is part of my life
Cath says:
Every day. Every single day I am awed by your neverending love for your child. And the difficulties of all that is life. Im thinking of you X
19th March 2010 at 10:53 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Cath, some days are better than other. We operate as a family unit, the only way to do it.
19th March 2010 at 11:08 am
Nicky says:
As a mom of 3 young girls , my heart goes out to your child most of all, and the effect that it has on siblings when one of a family are out of sorts in anyway. Your frustration screams through my screen as I read your post , all we can do is support you in anyway we can and again Education on Autism must be spread far and wide.
Please supply us with concise reading material that my girls can hand to their own school teachers when they wear their Badges on their blazers to school in April.
The School Shop will take 10 badges to hand out at school.
19th March 2010 at 11:10 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Nicky Thank you so much, you have mail
19th March 2010 at 11:15 am
Brottonlass says:
Sometimes you feel that you are at a dead end, a dog chasing its tail and that you have no tears left to cry. It’s frustrating that professionals in this country don’t have a clue and it reverts back to the Parents to sort it out. But we stick it out together and we WILL get the help for Kendall. I will NEVER let Autism get the better of us! I love you so much for taking Kendall in and treating her as your own and fighting to the bitter end with me. xx
19th March 2010 at 11:16 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
My dear Julie
19th March 2010 at 11:24 am
Linda says:
Hi Gerhard,
I was just wondering if you had tried Kendall at Vera School (which I am sure you have) , or do you class this as one of the “home,nut houses,institution’s” and if so would you mind helping me or explaining why you feel this way?
I too have a son with Autism and I feel your on going pain at living with this disorder daily.
I would very much appreciate your opinion on the above.
Thanks
19th March 2010 at 11:43 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Hi Linda, Vera School for learners Autism provide great service & education, I am referring to adult residential care for children school going in the school going age group 6-16 years old. Kendall is 13 & self opinionated idiots suggest that we place her in such residential care. We take ownership of our child. We know of cases where private investigators was employed to trace families where the family had no contact with their family member for more than 10 years.
19th March 2010 at 11:56 am
Cazpi says:
Wow. The teacher needs more than a stern talking to, cos honey, it’s part of the job. Loving for and nurturing your pupils as if they were your own children is how you teach, and enable them to grow. If you can’t deal with what is happening, what approaches have you actually tried? If everything – then this job is not for you, move on. #myrantover
Gerhard and Julie – you guys are amazing. Truly. I have no clue how to even start to help. But my very loud mouth and opinions – going to work those in a big way
Will email you later with a badge order…
19th March 2010 at 11:57 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Cazpi, Not a lot of peeps like you and Scott around working in the background to support Autism. How will we ever be able to say thank you.
19th March 2010 at 12:31 pm
Estelle says:
Gerhard and Julie, my heart breaks for you, Kendall and the boys – knowing that when your days are difficult, they sure are difficult!
I can’t help wondering what dear Kendall is experiencing in that awesome, complex mind of hers. I so wish one could reach her and assure her at a deep level, and that she could express those experiences.
HUGE hugs to you all x x
19th March 2010 at 12:54 pm
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Estelle Thank you, please don’t feel sorry for us, we represent an example of what families live with Autism daily. Together we can all make a small difference by help spreading the world of Autism, it’s real, it’s increasing significantly, we don’t have a cause, we don’t have a cure and we cannot ignore it anymore in South Africa. Personally I would do whatever it takes to ensure that people are aware of Autism Spectrum Disorder, that the least I can do, every little bit helps and nothing is to small or insignificant.
19th March 2010 at 1:13 pm
Estelle says:
Gerhard, I will always feel huge compassion for your family and others in the same position.
I’m with you on spreading the word … all my email contacts get regular news about stats, etc. Regularly speak to a midwife about it too so she can spread the news.
So, I stick with my HUGE hugs to you all x x
19th March 2010 at 2:08 pm
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
E, xxx
19th March 2010 at 2:26 pm
Anastacia Haddon says:
I am under the assumption that Kendall is at a school for autistic learners?
One would then assume that the teacher is trained up to deal with these kind of situations and behaviors? You can probably take that dude to teacher court or whatever cause I dont think it was dealt with in a professional manner. The note alone , the scratched out bits and his signature is NOT PROFESSIONAL at all. I would love to see actually what he attempted to write in the bits that were scratched out.
I will speak to my friend who is an HOD at a high school with regards to legalities on things like this and let you know.
Also where to buy a badge please…
PS: I see u quite the blogger these days and I am really enjoying your stories. Thanks and well done.
19th March 2010 at 1:49 pm
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Anastacia,
We are dealing with it in an professional manner, however Kendall now at home. DM me for badges
19th March 2010 at 2:19 pm
Leigh Selenati says:
Can I have 15 Badges please? How?
19th March 2010 at 9:31 am
Gerhard Pieterse aka jail4bail says:
Hiya Leigh, yip we have can courier or post if you want?
19th March 2010 at 9:38 am